But if a Look Should April Me/Dear With Your Sweet Face. The E.E. Cummings Project, Chapter 1.

BLOT: (24 Oct 2015 - 01:17:18 PM)

But if a Look Should April Me/Dear With Your Sweet Face. The E.E. Cummings Project, Chapter 1.

Though I have gotten back into writing poetry lately, I found myself in need of a full on project to give me an excuse to play with form. An odd idea struck me, at first as something like a joke: take poetry by E.E. Cummings (or ee cummings, if you prefer) and to rewrite it into more of a traditional style with very few of his syntactic tricks (while retaining some of his grammatical ones). As I talked about the joke, I realized it might be fun. I also realized it might make an interesting opportunity to rewrite other poets' poetry into a style that might have fit something that Cummings would write.

What I didn't quite realize is that there is no simple one-for-one interpretation for a lot of Cummings verse. While some of his tricks are just parlor, there are times when his seemingly broken verse says something that could not have been replicated in more precise terms. While I strive to get better at only touching some of the meter and rhyme and syntax of his poetry as I go, for this first one I decided to go ahead and take it as set of themes and wordplays, and to retain those while expanding out the poem itself to be a little more "Doug".

For my first poem, I took Cummings' "darling!because my blood can sing" and Emily Dickinson's "Life--Is What We Make of It" and rewrote them as something of a pair. In "darling!" there is a sense of the strife of life that is meaningless as long as a "look shall april" the poet. This term is best left ambigious, but I think the meaning is fairly clear. In Dickinson's, there is an idea of about life getting meaning from Christ and Death, but by using the words "He" and "Him" instead of which concept she precisely means, it makes many of the lines open to debate. Now, I took arguably more liberties with her poem to make it vibe with my take on "darling!", in that I made it more about an ambigious relationship with the idea that Life and Death means that the question of "We" is more pertinent to the moment and cannot be put off. Many of the original words from both poems are retained, but in a way different from the original.

"But if a Look Should April Me" (by Doug Bolden, 2015-10-22, with apologies to E.E. Cummings)

Darling, because my blood can sing and dance,
And does with your least look or quiet glance,
With your any most very amazing now or here,
To every "is not" under the spring, let pitiless fear
Play host, but if a look should april me, then ghosts
Of "is not" shall be lost on paths of their own knots.

Doubting can turn men's see to stare, joy to why,
Their faith to how, strident air to limp sighs,
But if just a mere look should april me, then
Some thousand million hundred breaths shall spring,
Bright worlds born out of my blue eyes opening,
And doubt unmade makes love darkly sing.

And on those nameless battlefields, for centuries,
Armies may meet armies in bloodshed and immensity,
And hate itself, with no smaller meanness, runs
Back and forth across the years, with nothing won.
But if a look should april me, even for half a when,
Even all my "I can never" shall fall and be broken.

But if a look should april me, even for half a when,
Though such a perfect hope is where despair begins,
And I am forced to look into the forest of my mind,
And there in the mountains of leaves, seek to find
My own death tumbling sticks and twigs into life,
May my fear be stilled, a brook flowing the hills of night.

"Dear with Your Sweet Face" (by Doug bolden, 2015-10-24, with apologies to Emily Dickinson)

Dear with your sweet
face(sweet nose sweet hair sweet eyes
made of rose and caramel)I gasp
Life(is what we make of it)and
Death(what we do not know)and
Who(with whom we met We on the road)might
justify you and us
and me and We with a casual though
Who is no stranger to trust
what others might betray
And Life(but nothing except
everything)this kiss
and your questions and Death(this
And all of this that
I)suffice a moment with all other distance
For We and It and Them have traveled to
Paradise(no new mile remains)
Far and short and far again
the hours shape and preced-
ing our tender pioneer-
ing base cowards we are for stop-
ping I do not know but
Dare we not venture forth to We,?

now

The originals, Cummings

darling!because my blood can sing
and dance(and does with each your least
your any most very amazing now
or here)let pitiless fear play host
to every isn't that's under the spring
- but if a look should april me,
down isn't's own isn't go ghostly they

doubting can turn men's see to stare
their faith to how their joy to why
their stride and breathing to limp and prove
- but if a look should april me,
some thousand million hundred more
bright worlds than merely by doubting have
darkly themselves unmade makes love

armies(than hate itself than no
meanness unsmaller)armies can
immensely meet for centuries
and(except nothing)nothing's won
- but if a look should april me
for half a when, whatever is less
alive than never begins to yes

but if a look should april me
(though such a perfect hope can feel
only despair completes strikes
forests of mind, mountains of soul)
quite at the hugest which of his who
death is killed dead. Hills jump with brooks:
trees tumble out of twigs and sticks;

Dickinson

Life—is what we make of it
Death—we do not know
Christ's acquaintance with Him
Justify Him—though

He—would trust no stranger
Other—could betray
Just His own endorsement
That—sufficeth Me

All the other Distance
He hath traversed first
No New Mile remaineth
Far as Paradise

His sure foot preceding
Tender Pioneer
Base must be the Coward
Dare not venture—now

A brief note about the picture above. I went outside yesterday to take photos for a fall photo context at the library I work out. However, the day was gray and blah enough (at that time, it later got sunny again), that I was unable to do the one trick I wanted, catching sunlightly through autumn leaves. I used a few touch up tricks to try and semi-replicate in post, though.

OTHER BLOTS THIS MONTH: October 2015