My Mom's New Beau

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Summary: My mom has a new boyfriend, or something like it, and I am generally ok with that, but briefly wonder if I shouldn't be.

Friday, 25 September 2009

(12:32:58 CDT)

My Mom's New Beau

I figure I'll write this now before I head out this afternoon for Gadsden's fair waters (well, it is supposed to rain a lot and there is a potentially flooded river near where I will be staying, so I might actually get to see a fair amount of water, whether or not the water itself is "fair"). My mom may be, for the first time in a decade, coming up to visit me this October. She has met Sarah, of course, but has not been up to visit since I've had a place of my own and all that jazz, so I am looking forward to it. Part of the blame rests with my late father. He grew fairly sick about the year 2000, and was quite sick in 2001. I think Spring of 2000 was his last real road trip. Between 2001 and 2007, when he died, my mom would make short daytrips to more local things, but Huntsville was that one hour too many, so to speak, a fact exasperated by her refusal to take the Interstate. She hates them dearly, especially when they go through any sort of municipal traffic, and will take the "back-road" routes all the way through Huntsville. Her average time to Huntsville is something like eight hours, and she has, on at least one occasion, swung through Guntersville specifically to camp out the night before completing the trip (this was the Spring 2000 trip).

She is not coming alone when she comes up, at least potentially not. She has a new, I don't know, beau. They hang out and talk and stuff, but I'm not sure if they are actually Dating or anything of the like. She is in her late 60s and he is, I assume, slightly over 70. Not to be rude or dismissive, but I assume that people at that age mostly just enjoy each other's company. In fact, I think this trip is going to be something of a first for them, allowing them to get away from my kin. My sister, brothers, and nieces/nephews divers are all sweet, loud, friendly people...and they may be a little too sociable for a person trying to spend some alone time with a new beau. It is not uncommon, say, for kids to get unceremoniously dropped off at any time of the day or night. Not really.

I get to be the excuse that leads to the full test run of their new relationship. I think I am ok with that. I mean, let's be honest, even if I weren't ok with it, my mom was in a pretty rough spot after my dad died. They were married in, I don't know, 1960 or so. That's 47 years. You spend 47 years being in love and annoyed by a person and the last 7 years are about taking care of them in a rough spot and have that come to an end. I've been in a fairly rough spot just worrying about her. She seems really happy, again, dressing up and planning trips and stuff. I am not going to be all weird or anything, at least not openly. I'm just not sure what I think. I know a lot of my friends come from homes with step-fathers/mothers or have went through a parent dying at an early age (or both). My homelife was almost painfully average, though. Man and wife. There were a couple of us kids at home (five children total, but the two oldest are 15-16 years older than me, and 22-23 years older than Shawn), some pets. They were were neither really open nor closed off, and though they had friends (and my mom even had friends of the opposite sex, but my dad didn't really); a lot of their time-as-people was actually time-as-couple. Seeing my mom without my dad was kind of odd for me. A lot of my memories involve them playing rummy at the table. Or checkers. Or my dad watching TV while mom did something else in the same room. Seeing my mom with someone else may feel odd.

Or, it may not. Let's face it, I am a weird guy with some pretty weird reaction matrices to every day events. I tend to take most things with a grain of salt even when I shouldn't. I personally can't see me getting upset when I meet the guy (and yes, I am reserving judgment until I meet him, all I know at this point in time is that the highly reactionary Shawn and equally highly reactionary Danny have not murdered anyone) but part of me wonders if I should. I know that sounds like a silly question, but, you know, isn't it supposed to be natural to be weirded out by such an occasion?

I'll be sure to let everyone know how it goes.

Si Vales, Valeo


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Written by Doug Bolden

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