Four Limericks

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Thursday, 27 August 2009

(14:38:52 CDT)

Four Limericks

I like writing limericks. I think they, like haiku, are a little too subjugated to laziness and limpness of form by people who think that anything short is easy. Good limericks, like good haiku, can take hours (or at least the better part of an hour) to write and edit unless they are the products of immediate and divine inspiration and all that. What's more, just like haiku is always about nature (thanks public education, for never telling that part), a limerick is always about some weird transgression. Or at least, most limericks are about transgressions. Something weird, obscene, or unexpected is supposed to happen to them. The best ones are dirty, it seems, but I've been wondering about other transgressions. Things that aren't dirty but invoke horror, jabs at religion, incorrect math and science. All the things that are obscene to someone. These first three were written over the past couple of days by me, and I am proud of them. The fourth one was written today, to make sure that I added a good dirty one in.

While eating a strange looking sandwich, one day, Doc became confused about alien technology. "Their lofty visitations Are actually great saltations, Made possible by a strict diet of virgin slaves."

A rural pastor, on matters parochial, Often cites God as loving and patriarchal. As for that group of kids, Torn, by a bear, to shreds, He is quick to cite the word "paradoxical".

Joe prefers to call August "Sexember", As would the Romans, if they remembered. Or so he claims, Though Joe's likely insane. He keeps his mom in the basement, dismembered.

A lugrubious man, with angina, Stays angry at his mother for her vagina. "If only she, Had given one to me, I would have been sure to make mine designer."

Si Vales, Valeo


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Written by Doug Bolden

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